August 16

Volkswagen: Das Awkward!

So, I had my very first lead rehearsal today! It was a completely nerve-wracking and humbling experience. Here is what I’ve learned so far:
Drama kids are surprisingly inclusive.
Leads are unofficially and automatically instated into the Gerund tea drinking society.
As demonstrated by Mrs.Gerund’s one-year old daughter, babies will eat anything.
Car doors are funny mechanisms that will never cease to cause me anguish.

The actual rehearsal was fairly generic in its level of innate satisfaction and optimistic aftertaste. What happened afterwards, however, is noteworthy in that it was downright cringe-worthy.

Rehearsal let out around 5:30 PM. As I was leaving, I noticed Peter standing in front of the office doors. Knowing that he lives on my street, and inwardly praising myself for my resourcefulness, I went over to offer him a ride. However, it turned out that Peter was headed to a shift at Dairy Queen, not to his house, and I had just volunteered myself to drive 15 minutes in the wrong direction! Luckily I was too awkward to point this out to him, especially over the puddle of drool that was forming in my subconscious, so the slipshod plan prevailed.

We made fairly quaint small talk during the drive to DQ, an impressive feat considering my struggle even to breathe and drive in the same instant! As we pulled up to our destination, I congratulated myself on taking just two wrong turns during the trip, both of which added mere minutes to our overall travel time.

I wished Peter a quick and easy shift as he got out of the car. Only, the passenger door was still locked, so he could not get out. I quickly fumbled with my key fob to find the “unlock” button. Pressing it, finally and triumphantly, I glanced up and was met with a blank stare from Peter. No dice.
I let out an exasperated grunt, and preceded to spam the “unlock” key on the driver’s side. When that didn’t work, I flopped across him to unlock it manually on the passenger door. The indicator claimed that the door was “unlocked”, and yet it still refused to open. I blushed as a 30-second féaux pas turned into a full-on awkward encounter. And then, I did the only thing that made sense at the time.
I said, “I swear I’m not trying to rape you.”
He let out a surprised laugh, and I nearly cringed in pain. What on earth was I thinking?
After I recovered from that injury, I got out of the car and walked around to open the demonic door from the outside, something that should have occurred to me minutes ago. After that, Peter left without more than a few hasty words of thanks. Can you blame the guy? If I were him, I wouldn’t have lasted even that long in that car; in fact, I probably would have smashed a window around the three minute mark, perhaps even before the casual date-rape comment!
Hopefully I didn’t blow my chances entirely, but I have a sinking suspicion that the nature of Peter and my relationship will be to get all the embarrassing behavior out of my system before I meet a guy who is actually well-suited for me. Here’s hoping that a relationship with that guy goes a little more smoothly!

How about you guys? Any awkward crush stories to share? Hopefully, the wounds are not quite so fresh as mine!
Bye for now,

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Copyright © 2014. All rights reserved.

Posted August 16, 2014 by Avery in category "Uncategorized


  1. By Ribena Tina @ ribenamusings on

    I find most groups quite inclusive to be honest but then I am very much a weirdo so it takes a while for people to warm up to me (or put up with me).

    I had to laugh at your comment to your passenger; it is very much something I would have said at your age…and very much I would say now but rest assured you will find someone who loves those little comments just as much as he loves you.

    Was the child lock on? I didn’t know they had child locks on front passenger doors now. I might try and find one on my car; it will cause me endless amounts of fun at my hubby’s attempt to get out of the car…..

    Wa ha ha ha
    Ribena Tina @ ribenamusings recently posted…Shocking, or at least to me, news storiesMy Profile

    1. By Avery (Post author) on

      Thanks Ribena!

      I would have to agree, most groups are inclusive! I think movies like Mean Girls disillusioned me to the rather kind reality of high school life! I haven’t heard of any “toilet swirlys” so far…

      I think being a “weirdo” is what makes your blog so fantastic! Normal can often be boring! ;)

      As for the possessed lock on my car, the cause is still a total enigma to me! If that is the desired effect, though, I think the child lock would be perfect!

      Let me know how your husband takes it; hopefully a little better than my crush! :P

  2. By CherylM. on

    Well, let’s see … how about seeing the guy of your dreams across the cafeteria and walking smack into a door because you are too busy “making eyes” at said dreamboat. Then to add insult to injury, you glance at him to see if he saw such tomfoolery and he is almost practically rolling on the floor laughing with his “buddies”. Oh, the humiliation of young lust… oops I mean love!!

    1. By Avery (Post author) on

      Thanks for sharing that cringe-inducing story, Cheryl!

      Oh, the humanity! Did he ever talk to you after that?

      I would still take laughter over a weird look from my dreamboat any day, though. After all, who says girls don’t score points for funniness? You can door-smack and banana peel-slip your way right into his pants! Did I say heart? Yes, his heart.

      1. By CherylM. on

        Oh yes, he did finally talk to me. The very next day. He said I made a real impression on him… not to mention the real big red “impression/knot/welt” I had on my forehead from the impact with the glass door! It’s a look not for the timid!

        We ended up dating for the rest of high school, but alas he didn’t turn out to be my forever dreamboat :(


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

CommentLuv badge